Family Lessons 9: Drunk at Morecambe

The Lancaster Gazette of 17 August, 1887, reported the outcome of my great, great uncle’s day trip to Morecambe. Suffice to say, it did not end well.

Thomas Davidson, farmer, of Tatham, was charged with being drunk at Morecambe on 30^th July. Supt. Moss said on the day, named defendant was found helplessly drunk at Morecambe. He was taken into custody and detained for some time, and then allowed to go home, and a summons issued against him. The defendant appeared that day, but he was not in a fit condition to come before them. The defendant, who was quite drunk and unable to get into the defendant’s box, was then asked what he had to say, when he replied “Well, Oh reet (hic). Will you allow me to say a few words (hic). I happened (hic) to have a lot of money on me, and (hic) a bank book (hic) and ____. The Chairman: It’s alright, you’ll be fined 5s and costs 9s. -Defendant was then removed.

The court journalist took some pleasure, I think, in seeing this silly man stumble around the court, quoting even the very hiccups emanating from his boozy throat. Now when I chair a court, I could not sentence an intoxicated man, who might be unable to recall his punishment. I suspect the chairman on this occasion knew that Uncle Tom would only ever turn up drunk, and the sooner he was sentenced, the better for all concerned. It is a good job he had a lot of disposable income and a bank book, for his drunken day out proved rather expensive in the end. It is a pity he had the spare cash to begin with. Had he been a little poorer, he might have contented himself with an ice cream and sarsaparilla on the prom.

Beware of spare cash, spare time, spare talents. If such are not used for good, they will inevitably be used for evil.

Wine is a mocker,

Strong drink is a brawler,

And whoever is led astray by it is not wise. Proverbs 20:1

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